Sometimes,  it’s easy to raise your own expectations about a situation just because it could possibly come true. I know I’m guilty of doing that – just when I like someone or I think life’s going well, something goes wrong because I put too much effort into thinking about it. This is very probable when it comes to friendship or dating, as first impressions can be deceiving. Either that or your nervousness puts a damper on what they thought of you and awkwardness ensued. It’s easy to put yourself into these situations without even realizing it. Being a shy person has its perks as you end up being the listener most of the time. However, when you’re asked a direct question (and you put too much thought into giving the “right” answer), it’s just as bad if you can’t find the words to say.

Awkwardness isn’t a bad thing – it can be endearing, for one thing. However, it’s not good to let yourself shut down and just mess up a situation just because you’re nervous. If the person you’re trying to form a relationship with really likes you, they won’t care if you say something silly or mess up a pronunciation. They’ll listen to you no matter what and like you for who you are. From personal experience, I’ve had to put behind me the times when I’ve messed up a possible connection just because I couldn’t think of anything to say and it just got weird. I embrace my personality, but sometimes, it’s hard not to freak out while talking to someone of interest or new in your life. When the inevitable “awkward silence” comes out, it’s best to find humor in the situation. Laugh a little. It catches on!

One huge tip I have for the nervous-talkers is: BE YOURSELF. Seriously, there’s not one situation that I regret being myself and just keeping it real. Even if some people aren’t receptive to you, they don’t matter in the long run. It’s the people who understand you and know where you’re coming from that are the best to put your time into. This might sound incredibly obvious, but sometimes the most obvious is the hardest to do. It’s taken me many years to realize that. Some people can be mean or not “get you,” but all of that negative energy is just not worth it.  Surround yourself with people who don’t question your uniqueness and accept you for you, awkward moments and all. In the long run, just keep clarity of the situation while being who you want to be, and your strong, independent self will thank you in the end.  Cheers!

This entry was posted on Sunday, June 27th, 2010 at 12:00 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.