Archive for January, 2013

Let go of the “should of’s “

Sunday, January 27th, 2013

Life can be filled with many challenges and sometimes just “hard”.  But, if you are reading this you have survived or you are getting through these moments.  There is so much to appreciate and celebrating about your life and where you are at this moment.  Joy & Peace are right in front of you and often they can be found in unexpected places.  We cannot afford to look back and have a “should of, would of” pity party.  We must embrace our future and be grateful and take nothing for granted.

Maybe things aren’t going in the right direction or where you had hoped.  Where ever things stand what ever happened, don’t marinate in it.  When we tell ourselves we should have made something happen, we should done this or that better, we invite and open the door to guilt, regret, and resentment.  It’s simply impossible. So, stop take the key, open the freedom door and free yourself from the “should of’s.  Cheers!

Happy Birthday! Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

Monday, January 21st, 2013

I have a dream, still in 2013.

I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation.

Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.

But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languishing in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. So we have come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.

In a sense we have come to our nation’s capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked “insufficient funds.” But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. So we have come to cash this check — a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice. We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quick sands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God’s children.

It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro’s legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. Those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. There will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.

But there is something that I must say to my people who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice. In the process of gaining our rightful place we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred.

We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force. The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. They have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom. We cannot walk alone.

As we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back. There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, “When will you be satisfied?” We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality. We can never be satisfied, as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro’s basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their selfhood and robbed of their dignity by signs stating “For Whites Only”. We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream.

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. Some of you have come from areas where your quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive.

Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed. Let us not wallow in the valley of despair.

I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.”

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

This will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with a new meaning, “My country, ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring.”

And if America is to be a great nation this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania!

Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!

Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!

But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia!

Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!

Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, “Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!”

Free Yourself

Sunday, January 13th, 2013

You don’t even have to say it I can already hear you thinking aloud.  If I tell the truth in every awkward situation, there will be hell to pay with my mother/husband/kids/sister/co-workers.  I get it.  There are people in your life who, for various reasons, don’t want to embrace your truth.  You may be thinking you have to change those people, but baby don’t even try.  It will not be worth the time or energy……..

I have longed live to make other people happy, rigid people more flexible, aggressive people more empathetic, and on and on.  I simply came to the realization that this never worked, and it was driving me insane and causing so much stress in my life.

The key I found that worked for me is to stay far away from the idea of “making” someone do, feel or think anything.  This is not your job.  Instead your job and focus should be to maximize your own personal happiness, kindness and health and let everyone else choose to follow or not.

You’ve already had enough life experiences to notice when a situation, a person or a task is marked as “poison”.  Remember how much that situation hurt you the last time and decide in this moment you don’t want to feel that level of pain again and that you choose happiness!  This process may require small steps and time.  Tell the truth and stay minding your own business.  Anything else might be poison.  You may one day real soon wake up and realize that you feel better, wiser, healthier and SO much happier.  Free Yourself.  Cheers!

Embracing 2013! Happy New Year!

Sunday, January 6th, 2013

Blessed to see another year!  I don’t know about you, but this has been good, and God showed me his favor on my life.  Just to name a few highlights I spent 9 wonderful days in Cape Town, South Africa, a weekend in Paris, France, and I was thankful and appreciative the entire 11 days.  I won’t complain, and I cannot host a pity party however, keeping it 100 there were some rough days for a sistah in 2012.  But, through it all, I’ve persevered and I am still thanking God for all of my experiences, I realize they have come to make me stronger.  And that I am.  I realize that some of my experiences and the results, were due to poor decision-making on my part, trusting people that did not deserve it, caring about people that didn’t care about me, but I have forgiven myself and despite some of my experiences I know I am still fabulous child of God.

As 2013 approached me I did some hard work, soul searching and identified my word and principal for 2013 “reciprocity”.  I am very clear on how I practice this principal and how others receive it.  Now here comes the change!  I am excited and I feel very good about letting some people, situations and experiences stay where they belong in 2012”.  You’ve had your moment but you won’t have the same experience in 2013.  As James Brown said, “I Feel Good”!  I really do.  Some lessons are hard to learn but I am so thankful that I got it!

We cannot go into the New Year with the old mindset; there are absolutely no benefits to that.  Decide today what it is you want from 2013, write it down and meditate on it.  The key to being successful is having a plan of action and being very methodical about bringing it into fruition.

Be purposeful, be fearless, be certain, be precise, be focused and most important be true to you!  The best is yet to come.  Expect all God goodness! Happy New Years!  Cheers to you!